The meaning of life changes when you sit with death.

I stood by my mother as she took her last two puffy breaths. That moment was an end to an era. There were no older generation left before me. I was now a family elder. My life was about to change. For the previous 8 nights and days, I had stayed with my mother at the hospice, witnessing the ending of life. Sitting with death, the meaning of life began to change for me. I saw that in the end, the only things that mattered were love, inner peace and trust in the Divine. Everything else became a non-issue. This new awareness lead me to evaluate my own life and make some changes.

Of course, in the midst of it all, I was too engaged in the moment to contemplate and process the experience. I was in the middle of an emotional storm; busy getting through it in the best way that I could.  The Hospice house around the corner from my house was full so we ended up in one that was 30 miles away. To be with my mother on her last days, I had to put just about everything else on hold. I cancelled all my appointments and rescheduled the radio shows and moved in to her room at the hospice. Other than 2-3 hours a day when I would go for a walk, eat and refresh, I lived in a sort of seclusion. My connection to others was mostly limited to phone calls and Facebook. Posting on Facebook as I went through experiences and the shower of love that I received from my friends, was a source of strength that tied me to the world outside of my cocoon.

The week after mom died, I was numb and exhausted. The first night home, I was still feeling a great deal of energy, perhaps from the adrenalin. The memory of holding my mother’s warm but lifeless body in my arms was still fresh and on the surface of my skin. I had waited for that moment for days and nights and it finally came. And now the only thing left was emptiness. That night I said goodbye to her by making a Facebook picture tribute to her. My mother’s wish was to not have a funeral or a memorial. She wanted the most simple and fuss-free exit. This was the only public honoring of her and a closure for me.

By midnight, I finally shut down. It was time for me to change my focus and care for me now. I allowed myself to follow my body’s lead and just rest. I couldn’t deal with my emotions. I slept over 16 hours a day for the first few days. The rest of the time, I stayed in my night gown, watched comedy on Netflix or read a book. I needed to keep my mind occupied because I felt too tired to deal with my emotions. I knew that the time for that will come but for now I just had to take care of my of my physical needs. 

By the second week, I began to feel more social, take calls and visit with friends. It was so healing to treat myself to hours of their love and attention. I felt a new appreciation for each of them and the love that freely flows between us. I felt wrapped in the soothing warmth of each friend that connected with me. Since I am blessed with an extensive circle of loving friends, I continue to have long quality visits with more friends each week which truly nurtures my soul. As I share my feelings with my them, I process stages of this intense event, examine my emotions and notice the messages they offer me. 

For the first time since I became a mother, I am no longer responsible for taking care of another person. I can do just about anything that I want with my time. It is a great opportunity for reflecting on my life and making deliberate changes. My intention is to explore a new way of being in the world that is more aligned with the person that is emerging from this experience. 

For over a month, I stopped all my work activities and amazingly enough, the world continued to go on without me. The week before mom went to hospice, my friend Lauren had suggested that I should take a few days away from work to rest and rejuvenate. I told her that I could not possibly see even two days that I could stitch together and rest! Having to stop and cancel everything for that exact week, in half an hour, was a reminder that I create my own rat race and that I can chose a different path. It was only when I was forced to stop, could I see that glaring fact! I have decided to take the time to look at my life from this perspective, before starting back up. 

Because of this event, not only my life, but I am changing. I recognize that it is important not to rush back to the life as it was before but to take this opportunity to re-asses and re-design my life as I would want it to be. I plan to take my time to reflect and understand my own emotions and what I am learning from this experience. With the support and encouragement of my enlightened life partner, I intend to make fundamental changes to my life that can support me in my spiritual growth. 

A few years ago, along my spiritual path, I became a student of Abraham-Hicks and the application of the law of attraction and the art of allowing. Since January of this year, I have been learning how to become a Spiritual Entrepreneur with Rev. Lauren McLaughlin. I am currently studying “The Power of intention” by Wayne Dyer and the “Mind is Your Own Business” by Rev. John McLaughlin. I intend to consciously practice the 7 faces of the Source Energy (Creativity, kindness, love, beauty, expansion, abundance and receptivity) which is outlined in “The Power of intention” in my daily life as well as to use the techniques I have learned from Abraham-Hicks and my spiritual teachers Rev. Lauren and John McLaughlin of Unity Now. 

For 4 months, until my birthday in August, I intent to invest in myself and make a commitment to use my time differently. I believe time is my only real currency and I plan to spend it more on being present than automatically doing things. I will spend more time meditating, contemplating and creating. I will be more consistent in caring for my body. So until mid august, I will only spend an average of 2 hours per day on promoting Change Thrivers and office work and use the rest to understand and discover a new of being and working.

I intend to nurture myself spiritually by:

• Awakening and drifting into sleep with thoughts of gratitude and setting intentions for each day
• Calming my mind through daily meditation, prayers and spending time in and with nature
• Remembering daily, the truth of who I am, using the 12 affirmations from www.UnityNow.com
• Living and consciously practicing the 7 faces of the Source Energy: Creativity, kindness, love, beauty, expansion, abundance and receptivity.
• Giving time to those things that bring me joy: Magda, my friends and family, cooking, gardening, artwork, writing, photography, reading, laughing
• Being aware and grateful for the constant stream of blessings in my life
• Being aware of the beauty around me
• Simplifying my life, paring down belongings, using feng shui to move the energy in my home and office

I intend to nurture myself physically by:

• Energizing and using my body daily: Walking, swimming, stretching, yoga, Pilates, Chi Kong, taking deep breaths, gardening, resting
• Selecting high vibration foods, eating more organic, planting herbs and vegetables, preparing more home cooked foods
• Drinking 48 oz or more water daily

I intend to nurture myself mentally by:

• Studying spiritual concepts and applying them to my life
• Choosing what I consume with my mind
• Keeping away from the news, commercials, radio and TV
• Being aware of my thoughts
• Creating new Change Thrivers radio shows
• Recording and blogging about my experiment
• Deciding on strategies for where to go next with Change Thrivers
• Streamlining my work methods for the most efficiency of time and resources

 I intend to nurture myself emotionally by:

• Being aware of my emotions
• Validating emotions as my internal indicators and allowing myself to fully feel them
• Expressing and processing them
• Listening for and honoring the messages they bring forward

I intend to serve others by:

• Teaching about change by authentically sharing my own process of change with others

I am taking a journey of change and self-discovery to welcome a new era of my life consciously and with forethought. I have gone through many changes along the path of a very eventful life. But this is the first time that I can share my methods so freely with so many others as I experience them. I know that the work of my spirit is to teach others how to navigate their life changes. What better way to teach than to share my truth as I make a great change in my own life. So I invite you to come along with me as I tell you what happens as I go along the way.

You can read my blogs and watch my pictures on this blog and my Change Thrivers Page on FB. The timing and the format of entries will be in Divine Order and when I have something real to share with you. I would so appreciate your feedback.

With deep gratitude and love for all of you who are reading.

Afsaneh

Stress is the mental, physical, emotional, and behavioral reactions to any perceived demands or threats. Stress can be anything that stimulates you and increases your level of alertness.

Change and stress go hand in hand; they are both facts of life. The same way that all changes are not negative, all stresses are not negative either. In fact, you need a certain amount of stress in your life to function at your best. Some stress can bring excitement and challenge to your life. The key is to have the right type and amount of stress so you will not feel overwhelmed.

Excerpt from Change Thrivers – Your Resource Guide For Making Change Work

Levels of Stress

Acute Stress
The most common form of stress is acute stress. It comes from demands and pressures of the recent past and anticipated demands and pressures of the near future. Acute stress is thrilling and exciting in small doses, but too much is exhausting.

Episodic Acute Stress
Some people suffer acute stress frequently, and their lives are so disordered that they are continually experiencing chaos and crisis. They’re always in a rush, but always late. If something can go wrong, it does. They take on too much, have too many irons in the fire, and can’t organize the slew of self-inflicted demands and pressures clamoring for their attention. They seem perpetually in the clutches of acute stress.

Chronic Stress
While acute stress can be thrilling and exciting, chronic stress is not. This is the grinding stress that wears people down day after day, year after year. Chronic stress destroys bodies, minds and lives. It causes chaos through long-term slow destruction. It’s the stress of poverty, of dysfunctional families, of being trapped in an unhappy marriage or in a despised job or career.

Burnout
A state of physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion caused by unrealistically high aspirations and illusory and impossible goals.

The Stress Solution by Lyle H. Miller, Ph.D., and Alma Dell Smith, Ph.D.

Managing Stress

Breathing Technique

• Sit or lie down comfortably.
• Take a slow deep breath and imagine pulling all the tension in your feet and legs into your lungs—then push them out with a gentle exhalation.
• Take another slow and deep breath, this time visualizing the tension in your hands and arms expelling with your exhalation.
• Repeat the slow, deep breathing and release the tension in your back, neck, shoulder, head, face, chest, and stomach.
• Devote a full breath for any particular part of your body that is especially tense.

Excerpt from Change Thrivers – Your Resource Guide For Making Change Work

Action Plan to Manage Stress

Reflect on and Journal – “Causes of My Stress”

• The issues that cause me stress are…
• Actions I can take to contain, control, or eliminate problems that cause me stress…
• Actions I can take to improve my health and environment that can help me deal with stress better…
• Stress management techniques that I will incorporate into my life…

Excerpt from Change Thrivers – Your Resource Guide For Making Change Work

Change Thrivers Radio Show
Airs on Monday, March 7^th, 2011 at 6:30pm EST!
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/change-thrivers

For almost 14 years now, Dr. Stephanie Stanfield has been helping women who have struggled through crippling fears, debilitating illnesses and overwhelming obstacles.  Her credentials as a teacher and seeker, combined with her PhD and Doctorate of Theology in Spiritual Counseling have made her a world-wide published author and expert in energy medicine, stress and stress management techniques.  In short, she’s a great resource for our Change Thrivers who have been walking through their own shadows, and want to leave them behind forever.    www.liveyourpresentmoment.com   

Change Thrivers need fearless leaders on their mission to their highest lives, and Dr. Stephanie has the qualifications to lead.  She’s walked through her own severe migraines that were only increasing in severity and frequency, combined with severe allergies, taking medications up to three times the levels deemed safe, being told by her physicians that she’d need to “live in a bubble”.  She decided that wasn’t acceptable, and began researching the connection between her body and her mind.  Three months later, her symptoms were gone, and she’d found health, a passion, and a new life mission – to help other people live their highest potential.

So, Change Thriver…. Are you stuck?  Are you longing for a life of freedom and health?  Dr. Stephanie uses many forms of Energy Medicine, including EFT, PSYCH-K, Matrix Reimprinting, Reiki, Distance Healing, Stress Management, Self Esteem, Angel Cards, Sacred Contract work and more. She partners with her clients to uncover the unique combinations that help them have the breakthroughs they so desperately want.  If you’re ready to come into a greater understanding of what is you, and empower the phenomenal being you truly are…. come join Dr. Stephanie and learn why living your present moment is the most holistic, healthy place to be. 

Cannot listen live?  Visit http://www.changethrivers.com/category/archived-shows/ for archived shows when you are ready.
 
Upcoming Shows
March 21, 2011
“Taming Parental Anxiety while Parenting Teens” Delene Cole

April 4, 2011
“Emotional Exhibitionism: Authentic Expression as a Path to Health” Theresa Rose

Archived Shows
“Go to ELF-Teachings of Eternal Life Force” How the ELF steps forward to help those who embrace change and allow for Spirit to participate in the natural unfoldment of our life experience. – Lauren McLaughlin
http://www.changethrivers.com/go-to-elf-teachings-of-eternal-life-force/

“Releasing Unfinished Business” The steps to complete Unfinished Business – even when it includes someone who can’t or won’t meet us halfway – Eileen Broer
http://www.changethrivers.com/releasing-unfinished-business/

Upcoming events
Change Thrivers Presents three upcoming series dedicated to transformation for women!  

How can you better communicate with different personality types, resolve problems and deal with change? “The Language of Understanding” Tele-series is forming. For early notification e-mail your name to info@ChangeThrivers.com and write “Early notification e-mail – Language of Understanding” on the subject line. We will add you to our list and you will be the first to know about the next series.

How can you communicate your point so you can be heard?  “Communicating for Results” Tele-Series is forming now!  For early notification e-mail your name to info@ChangeThrivers.com and write “Early notification – Communicating for Results” on the subject line.

How can you get through divorce with the least damage and rebuild a brighter future? Change Thrivers “Divorce“ Tele-Series and Support for Women is forming. For early notification e-mail your name to info@ChangeThrivers.com and write “Early notification e-mail – Divorce” on the subject line.  

Free Offers
Free Change Thrivers E-workbook and Free Shipping, Order Change Thrivers – Your Resource Guide For Making Change Work at www.ChangeThriversBook.com.

For Sponsorship opportunities or to invite Afsaneh to speak, facilitate a workshop or a change circle at you next event, e-mail info@ChangeThrivers.com.
 
Many thanks to our sponsors:
Kathy Perry at www.Kathyperry.com for social media marketing guidance
Terez Hartmann at www.RockMYSpirit.com for our theme song, “Welcome Change”
VonHenry Media Productions at www.VonHenry.com for producing our videos and still shots
Joanne Wieland at www.LinkToExpert.com for promoting Change Thrivers Concept
Dalla Johnson at Lucky Copy www.LuckyCopy.com for writing and PR services
Venita Garvin Valdez at The Garvin Valdez Group, LLC, www.VenitasViewOnline.com
Christy DeArment Martin & Judy Lynn Koons at Psychic Potentials www.psychicpotentials.com
Magda Santos at New Life Healings www.NewLifeHealings.com

Numbing out is a phase of change that you only recognize after you have gone through it. Think of it as a safety fuse that blows when electrical current becomes excessive. You numb out when you cannot handle the emotional load.

Numbing out can happen in two ways:

1. Unconscious – This is a protective mechanism to keep you from being overloaded.
2. Conscious attempt to avoid pain – This is done by engaging in addictive behaviors.

There can be many reasons for numbing out such as:

• Reaching a saturation point
• Feeling overwhelmed
• Experiencing undesired change
• Experiencing events that are too painful
• Experiencing  a spiritual void

 10 Indicators That You Have Numbed Out

1. Depression or sadness
2. Reduced appetite
3. Lost humor
4. Lack of focus and concentration
5. Isolation, detachment, and disinterest
6. Low energy
7. Low motivation
8. Low libido
9. Tunnel vision
10. Cycling thoughts running over and over in your mind

Excerpt from Change Thrivers-Your Resource Guide for Making Change Work

To hear this episode click here: To Replace or Not to Replace! Hormone Replacement Therapy

Dr. Saxena discussed the following:

• What is the difference between peri-menopause, menopause and post-menopause?
• What are the common symptoms of peri-menopause?
• How is it different for women who had hysterectomy?
• How do hormone levels differ between peri-menopause and menopause?
• What is the conventional or allopathic view of Hormone Replacement Therapy?
• As an Integrative Physician, how do you view Hormone Replacement Therapy?
• What is the difference between Hormone Replacement Therapy and Bioidentical Hormone Replacement Therapy?
• What are the main ways to get tested for a hormone imbalance?
• What are the benefits of Bioidentical HRT?
• Why don’t insurance companies and most doctors use BHRT?
• Where can patients find a provider who is able to provide BHRT?
• What role do things like diet, obesity, or constipation play in menopause symptoms?

About Dr. Saxena:

Through the last decade of taking care of adults and children, Dr. Saxena’s philosophy and experience have grown to recognize that true healing must be self-initiated. She sees her role as a guide and partner with her patients. She creates an approachable and non-judgmental space where a person can be courageous enough to explore and make the changes necessary to experience total wellbeing. www.sevamedinstitute.com & http://www.centerforlivingwellness.com/

Change and stress go hand in hand; they are both facts of life. The same way that all changes are not negative, all stresses are not negative either. In fact, you need a certain amount of stress in your life to function at your best. Some stress can bring excitement and challenge to your life. The key is to have the right type and amount of stress so you will not feel overwhelmed.

Excerpt from “Change Thrivers – Your Resource Guide for Making Change Work” www.ChangeThriversBook.com

Dr. Saxena graduated from the University of Florida College of Medicine through an honors medical program and completed her Family Practice residency at St. Vincent’s Medical Center in Jacksonville, Florida. There she served as Chief Resident and completed her certification in Low Risk Obstetrics continuing to expand her comprehensive knowledge of family medicine. She continues to maintain her Board Certification in Family Practice.

She joined a private practice where her mission was working with rural and inner-city underserved patients in Jacksonville. Caring for patients who were challenged to care for themselves, she further experienced how the power of education and respect for people far outweigh the benefits and results of any drug therapy. She is known for her ability to take intricate medical subject matter and make it understandable and actionable by patients. Combining this skill with her desire to serve people, the practice was born. ‘Seva’ is an ancient Sanskrit term that translates to ‘selfless service’ and Dr. Saxena’s original commitment to providing this type of service to the community remains as our driving force.

Through her entire educational and professional experience, Dr. Saxena believed that the ultimate goal of caring for patients was to cure disease and make them feel better. Unfortunately, she realized early on in her career that this was not happening with the standards of care which she was taught. On a mission, she returned to fundamental physiology and completed advanced training at the Institute for Functional Medicine and other nationally recognized Integrative Medicine programs.

Today, Dr Saxena brings her unique style of education to her local community to create awareness for the importance of lifestyle modification for achieving their loftiest health goals. She also speaks throughout the country educating physicians on how to implement clinically effective programs for reversing chronic disease. SevaMed Institute and the Center for Living Wellness represent the culmination of Dr. Saxena’s long-held vision for creating a life-changing place for the health-oriented community. 

Learn more about her and her services at www.sevamedinstitute.com and  www.centerforlivingwellness.com

Menopause and HRT

Through the last decade of taking care of adults and children, Dr. Saxena’s philosophy and experience have grown to recognize that true healing must be self-initiated. She sees her role as a guide and partner with her patients. She creates an approachable and non-judgmental space where a person can be courageous enough to explore and make the changes necessary to experience total wellbeing.

Read a longer blog about Dr. Saxena and learn more about her and her services at www.sevamedinstitute.com and  www.centerforlivingwellness.com